It's small!
No, please. No! Please!
Davey!
Come a runnin', lad!
- Stop! - Brand you like a damn steer!
- Bitch! - No. Please!
Hold the bitch, Davey! Go on, hold her!
Hold her, damn it, or I'll cut her tits off!
Go get Skinny! Quick!
Mike, don't!
Skinny!
You think it's funny?
Skinny, get the gun!
Get off of her, cowboy.
- They wouldn't let you settle it, huh? - Hell, you know how Skinny is.
He says he's gonna shoot 'em. I says, "Skinny, you can't do that."
and he says, "Well let's get Little Bill in here and settle this thing."
and I says, "Little Bill's sleeping."
He says, "He don't care." In another five minutes he's gonna shoot them boys.
She going to die?
She's going to live.
She didn't steal nothing... she didn't even touch his poke.
All she done, when she seen he had a teensy little pecker...
...was give a giggle, that's all. She didn't know no better.
You can hang 'em, Little Bill.
Clyde...
step over to the office and get the bullwhip.
A whippin? That's all they get after what they done?
- Whippin' ain't no little thing, Alice. - But what they done they...
Alice! Shut up!
- Little Bill... whippin' ain't going to settle this. - Oh no?
This here's a lawful contract between me and Delilah Fitzgerald, the cut whore.
I brought her clear from Boston, paid her expenses and all.
I got a contract that represents an investment of capital.
Property.
Damaged property.
Like if I was to hamstring one of their cow ponies.
Well you figure nobody'll wanna fuck her now, right?
Hell, no!
Least ways won't pay to do it!
Maybe she can clean up the place or something,
but nobody's going to pay good money for a cut-up whore!
You boys are off the Bar T. You got your own string of ponies?
Yeah, I got four.
Six.
Guess you'd just as soon not have a trial, no fuss, huh?
No, sir.
All right.
You did the cutting.
Come the fall, you bring in five ponies and you give them over to Skinny here.
Five?
And you! You bring in two.
- You give them over, you hear? - Yes, sir.
The bullwhip Bill.
Maybe we don't need this whip now.
Let me tell you, come the spring, Skinny don't have those ponies...
- I'm gonna come looking for you. - You ain't even gonna whip 'em?
Well I fined them instead, Alice.
For what they done, Skinny gets some ponies and that's it?!
That ain't fair Little Bill.
That ain't fair!
Haven't you seen enough blood for one night, hmm?
Hell, Alice!
It ain't like they was tramps or loafers or bad men.
You know, they were just...
...hardworking boys that was foolish.
If they was given over to wickedness in a regular way I'd understand...
Like whores?
Alice!... Tend to Delilah.
Go ahead.
I got $85.
I don't know.
If Delilah doesn't care one way or the other, what are we getting so riled up about?
Just because we let them smelly fools ride us like horses...
...don't mean we gotta let them brand us like horses.
Maybe we ain't nothing but whores, but we... by God, we ain't horses!
I got $112.
That's everything.
How about you, Faith?
200.
$240.
Jesus, Faith! What you been doing?
You been giving Skinny something special?
She laughed.
With what Kate got, and Silky got some, and then mine and Little Sue...
It ain't enough.
Not yet, maybe.
You don't look like no rootin'-tootin'...
...son-of-a-bitching cold-blooded assassin.
Say what?
My guess is you're calling yourself Mr. William Munny.
You have me confused with someone else, mister.
The same one who shot Charlie Pepper up in Lake County?
Pa! Hey Pa!
Yeah, what's up, son?
Two more hogs got the fever.
You shot Charlie Pepper didn't you?
...and you're the one who killed William Harvey and robbed that train over in Missouri.
Now hold on, mister.
Son, get those hogs separated there.
Penny, why don't you help your brother out.
That one's sick too.
We'll talk inside.
So you're Pete Sothow's nephew, huh?
I thought maybe you was someone come to kill me for something I'd done in the old days.
I could have.
Easy.
I guess maybe so.
Like I was sayin' you don't look like no meaner-than-hell, cold-blooded, damn killer.
Maybe I ain't.
Yeah, well Uncle Pete says you was the meanest goddamn son-of-a-bitch alive.
And if I ever wanted a partner for a killing...
...you were the worst one.
Meaning the best.
On account as you're as cold as the snow...
...and you don't have no weak nerve nor fear.
Pete said that, huh?
Yeah, he did.
I'm a damn killer myself, except...
...I ain't killed as many as you because of my youth.
Schofield Kid, that's what they call me.
Why?
You from Schofield?
No, it's on account...
...of my Schofield model Smith & Wesson pistol.
How about it, Will?
How about what?
How about being my partner?
I'm heading up North in through Niobrara up to Wyoming.
Gonna kill a couple of no-good cowboys.
For what?
For cutting up a lady. Cut up her face.
Cut her eyes out, cut her ears off.
Hell, they even cut her teets.
Jesus!
$1,000 reward, Will.
500 apiece.
Pa... I can't move those damn pigs!
Watch your cussing now, will you? Do the best you can with it.
Then go to the pump and get cleaned up. Come on.
I ain't like that anymore, Kid.
It was whiskey done it as much as anything else.
I ain't had a drop in over 10 years.
My wife, she cured me of that.
Cured me of drinking and wickedness.
Well you don't look so prosperous.
Hell, you could buy her a new dress with your half.
If we kill them two, you can buy your wife one of them fancy...
She's passed on.
What?
Been gone near 3 years now.
Don't tell no one else about the reward and all.
I don't need other gunmen trying to collect.
We don't see no one out here.
Yeah.
Well if you was to change your mind, might be you could catch me,
I'll be riding due West to the Western Trail heading North into Wyoming.
Come on, let's separate those hogs.
Pa... two of them others...
I think they got the fever.
Took you boys a while.
A couple more days and I was going to call on the sheriff.
How about that?
The river was all swelled up. Couldn't cross it.
I bet. Sleepy, get them horses on in the livery.
Neil, take that one over around the back.
Ah, now here's a beauty.
You got two of mine. This here one ain't yours.
Oh, we gonna see about that.
Bastards! Get out of town!
You are very sick sons of bitches!
Don't come back, butcher!
This here pony...
...I brung for the lady, the one my partner cut.
She's the best of the lot.
Better than the ones I gave him.
She can sell her or...
...or do what she wants.
A pony? She ain't got no face left, you're gonna give her a god-damned mangy pony?
She ain't mangy ma'am!
Get out of here!
We don't need your goddamn charity!
Get out of our town and don't come back!
Get out of our town!
Did Pa use to kill folks?
Penny, I could tell your Ma liked those flowers I gave her.
He ain't hardly a saddle horse no more, Pa. He ain't used to the feel.
You take care of your sister now, son...
and you kill a few chickens if you have to, and keep those hogs that got the fever separate.
If you have any problem, you go see Sally Two Trees at Ned Logan's.
Ain't hardly been in the saddle myself in a while.
This old horse is getting even with me for the sins of my youth.
In my youth before I met your dear departed Ma...
...I used to be weak and given to mistreating animals.
This horse and those hogs over there...
...are getting even with me for the cruelty that I inflicted.
I used to be able to cuss...
...and whip a horse like this, but your Ma, rest her soul, showed me the error of my ways.
I'll be back in a couple of weeks.
You remember how the spirit of your dear departed Ma watches over you.
- Where'd you get that money? - We ain't got any money!
- You told them cowboys you had it! - We was lying!
Lying?
What are you gonna do when somebody comes to collect?
You going to hump them a thousand times?
The kind of people who come after that thousand won't tolerate you not having it!
They won't just cut up your face a little!
You stupid bitches.
You stupid bitches!
Shit!
Damn it! Jesus!
Hit your finger, huh?
Hello, Skinny.
Damn, you snuck up on me.
What do you think of her?
Well, I heard you done the roof yourself.
Roof? Jesus, Skinny, I did practically the whole damn thing myself.
The Roberts boy he carried some wood for me, but that's all.
What is all that wood?
Well that's for my porch.
I'm building a porch so I can sit of an evening...
...and smoke my pipe and drink coffee and watch the sunset.
Well... Came all the way out here just to take a look at her, huh?
- Oh them whores! - Yeah?
Them whores have been humping them cowboys who been in town the last 2 weeks.
Shit, Skinny.
You know... We got railroad barons. We got cattle barons.
You're gonna be the first billiard baron.
Yeah, well, they been humping them and telling every bowlegged one of them...
...that, uh, they're paying $1,000 to whatever son-of-a-bitch...
...kills the two boys that cut up Delilah.
Those cowboys are riding that beef down to Kansas and Cheyenne?
How long? All week?
Well I didn't hear nothing till last night myself.
Hell, the word's probably got all the way to Texas by now.
Shit, Bill, I guess nobody's gonna come clear from Texas.
You sure those whores got all that money?
Well, you know how women can lie.
Knock 'em around a little bit, ask 'em where the money is, they ain't got none.
But they could have squirreled away that much the five of 'em. Maybe.
That much, huh?
You could run off them two cowboys.
I could run off them whores.
Well, I guess they'll just up and run anyhow, them two.
Nope... They'll stay out there at the Bar T.
Close to their friends.
Shit, could be nobody won't come at all.
Well, gotta go. I like your house.
Well, I'll be...
It's Will!
Hey Will!
Come on in the house out of the sun. Sally...
...see to Will's horse.
Sally.
What you doing here Will?
Just thought I'd drop in on you.
Yeah, Will, we ain't bad men no more.
Shit, we're farmers.
Should be easy killing them, supposing they don't go on down to Texas first.
How long has it been since you fired a gun at a man Will? Nine, ten years?
Eleven.
Easy, huh?
I don't know it was all that easy even back then.
And we were young and full of beans.
Mean, if you was mad at them Will, I mean...
...if they done you some wrong, I could see shooting them.
We done stuff for money before Ned.
We thought we did.
All right so what'd these fellows do? Cheat at cards?
Steal some strays? Spit on a rich fellow? What?
Naw, they cut up a woman.
What?
Cut up her face, cut her eyes out, cut her fingers off, cut her tits.
Everything but her cunny, I suppose.
I'll be dogged.
Well... guess they got it coming.
Of course, you know Will...
...if Claudia was alive, you wouldn't be doing this.
Don't suppose you'd mind looking in on my youngsters next week?
They got some hogs they're trying to separate.
Will?...
How long you reckon you're gonna be?
Two weeks, I guess.
Will?...
Um...
This Kid, what's he like?
Three ways?
I see you still have that Spencer rifle, huh?
Yeah... and I can still knock the eye out of a bird flying too.
Jesus, Will!
He must be moving right along.
We'll come across him tomorrow, I reckon.
Kind of got used to my bed.
This ain't going to be like no home.
Bed ain't the only thing I'm gonna be missing, I tell ya.
Hell, Will, I'm sorry.
Don't fret it. It ain't nothing.
She don't like it much does she...
...you riding off with me?
Gave me the evil eye.
You know, Sally's injun...
...and injuns ain't over-friendly Will.
I don't blame her.
I ain't gonna hold it against her.
She knew me back then.
She knew what a...
...no-good son-of-a-bitch I was.
She just ain't allowing that I've changed.
She don't realize I ain't like that no more.
- You know Will.... - I ain't the same, Ned.
Claudia straightened me up. Cleared me of drinking whiskey and all.
Just cause we're going on this killing...
...that don't mean I'm gonna go back to being the way I was.
Just need the money.
Get a new start for them youngsters.
Ned, you remember that drover I shot through the mouth...
...and his teeth came out the back of his head?
I think about him now and again.
He didn't do anything to deserve to get shot...
...least nothing I could remember when I sobered up.
You was one crazy son-of-a-bitch Will.
Yeah, no one liked me and the boys all thought...
...I was gonna shoot them out of pure meanness.
You ain't like that no more.
Eagle, he hated my guts.
Bonaparte didn't think too much of me either.
Quincy neither, I reckon.
Quincy used to just watch all the time...
...scared.
Well, like I said...
...you ain't like that no more.
That's right.
I'm just a fellow now.
I ain't no different than anyone else...
...no more.
All I wanna know is what son-of-a-bitch shot him is all? Was it one of them John Bulls?
Oh, no, sir. I believe the would-be assassin to be a gentleman of French ancestry.
Or so it would seem. I don't wish to give offense when I observe...
...but the French are known to be a race of assassins...
...though they can't shoot worth a damn.
Any Frenchmen in the present company are excluded, of course.
Says here a fellow by the name of Guiteau. G-U-I-T--
Sure as hell sounds like a John Bull to me.
Well sir, again, I don't wish to give offense when I suggest that this country should select...
...a king or even a queen, rather than a President.
One isn't that quick to shoot a king or a queen.
The majesty of royalty, you see.
Well maybe you don't wish to give offense, sir...
...but you are giving it pretty thick.
This country don't need no queens whatsoever I reckon.
- As a matter of fact when I heared about queens... - Shut up, Joe.
What the hell's wrong with you, Thirsty? This dude son-of-a-bitch...
Might be that this dude here is English Bob.
He's the one works for the railroad shooting Chinamen.
Might be he's waiting for some crazy cowboy to touch his pistol...
...so he can shoot him down.
Is that a fact, mister?
You English Bob?
Pheasants.
Let's shoot some pheasants.
Ten shots.
At, let's say, $1 a pheasant.
I'll shoot for the Queen, and you...
...for... well, whomever.
That's eight for me and one for you.
That comes to seven of your American dollars.
Pretty damn good shooting...
...for a John Bull.
Well no doubt your aim was affected by your grief...
...over the injury to your President.
Ah, it's the climate that does it. That, and the infernal distances.
Does what?
Induces people to shoot persons in high places.
Yeah, uh...
You know it's a savage country really.
That's the second one they've shot in twenty years.
It's uncivilized shooting persons of substance.
Thank you.
Pardon me, gentlemen.
The local ordinance obliges you to surrender all sidearms...
to the proper authorities for the duration of your visit.
Proper authority?
Well I can assure you young man...
that neither my companion or I carry firearms on our person.
We rely upon the goodwill of our fellow man...
...and the forbearance of reptiles.
Unarmed, my ass!
Oh, Christ, it's hot!
If I'm going to get shot, I'd rather it was hot than cold.
Everything hurts me more when it's cold.
You know how if you hit your thumb and it's cold...
Shut up, Fatty!
I only said...
Clyde's back.
- Is Little Bill with him? - No.
Shit!
- You boys clean my Remington? - Cleaned and loaded.
Where's Little Bill for Christ's sake?
Building his damn porch.
Building his porch?
If you gonna get shot Andy, would you like it better on a hot day or a cold day?
I ain't going to get shot.
He's coming ain't he?
Of course he's coming.
I just loaded that, what you doing?
I don't trust nobody to load my guns for shooting.
What'd he say?
Little Bill? Didn't say nothing. He said he was building his porch.
- You seen that thing? - It was all loaded.
Jesus, Clyde, you got three pistols and you only got one arm for Christ's sake!
I just don't want to get killed for lack of shooting back.
You know he don't have a straight angle on that whole goddamn porch!
Or the whole house, for that matter!
He is the worst damn carpenter.
He didn't say nothing, huh?
Asked what they looked like, that's all.
Christ maybe he's tough but he sure ain't no carpenter.
Maybe he ain't so tough.
Seem like he was scared?
Little Bill? Him scared?
We never seen him up against any like these ones.
Killers.
Little Bill come out of Kansas and Texas, boys.
He worked them tough towns.
Just wondered.
Anybody could be scared.
Well, he wasn't scared, boys.
He just ain't no carpenter.
Well there's a dignity in royalty...
...a majesty which precludes the likelihood of assassination.
Now if you were to point a pistol...
...at a king or a queen, your hands would shake as though palsied.
I wouldn't point no pistol at nobody sir.
Well that's a wise policy... a wise policy...
but if you did, I can assure you, if you did, that the sight of royalty...
...would cause you to dismiss all thoughts of bloodshed and you would stand...
...how should I put it...
...in awe.
Now... a President... well, I mean... why not shoot a President?
Keep the change.
This Strawberry Alice person, tell me again.
Down the street and across... Greely's Beer Garden and Billiard Parlor.
Just ask for Alice, say you want a game of billiards.
Billiards? Even though I don't really wish to play?
No matter. They burned the table in '78 for firewood.
Quite right... quite right.
Well Mr. Beauchamp, I think a cup of tea...
Hello, Bob.
Boys, this here is English Bob.
Shit and fried eggs!
Been a long time Bob.
Did you run out of Chinamen?
Little Bill?
Well, I thought that you was um... well I thought that you were dead.
I see you've shaved your chin whiskers off.
I was tasting the soup two hours after I ate it.
Well actually, what I heard was that you...
...fell off your horse, drunk, of course...
...and that you broke your bloody neck.
I heard that one myself, Bob.
Hell, I even thought I was dead.
Till I found out it was just that I was in Nebraska.
Who's your friend?
W. W. Beauchamp.
This is Little Bill Daggett.
And friends, of course.
Daggett? From Newton, Hays? From Abilene?
In person.
You work for the railroads too Mr. Beauchamp?
No.... I write. I write...
Letters?
Books, Bill. Books.
Actually...
...he's my biographer.
I wouldn't do that if I were you...
Mr. Beauchamp.
It's only a book.
A book, huh?
Well I guess that means you boys can read.
So I guess that means you saw the signs outside of town there saying surrender your firearms.
But like you told young Andy here...
...you're not armed, are you Bob?
Well, not really, Bill.
Got a Peacemaker, but that wouldn't worry you, would it?
I mean if you don't see it. Or most particularly, if you don't hear it.
I'm afraid so, Bob.
I don't like firearms around.
Be very careful with it, sonny.
Charley...
see what kind of books Mr. Beauchamp is packing here.
Make sure you don't get wet.
No shit Lttle Bill...
all he's got here is writing stuff and this here book.
"The Duck of Death"?
Duke.
"The Duke", Bill.
Well, good afternoon, gentlemen.
I'll have that .32, Bob.
Now, Little Bill...
...you will leave me at the mercy of my enemies.
Enemies, Bob?
You been talking about the Queen again?
On Independence Day?
I guess you think I'm kicking you, Bob.
But it ain't so!
What I'm doing is talking!
You hear?!
Talking to all those villains down there in Kansas!
And I'm talking to all those villains in Missouri!
And all those villains...
...down in Cheyenne!
And I'm telling 'em there ain't no whore's gold!
And even if there was, well they wouldn't want to come looking for it...
...anyhow!
What are you all looking at?!
Go on! Get outta here!
Scoot!
Go on, mind your own business!
Hey, Will?
You ever go into town?
On occasion. To sell a hog, pick up supplies.
No, no... I mean, get yourself a woman.
No, I never go into town for that.
A man like me?
Only woman a man like me could get is one he'd have to pay for.
That ain't right, buying flesh.
Claudia, rest her soul, would never want me doing something like that...
...me being a father and all.
So.... you just use your hand?
I don't miss it all that much.
Will?!
Goddamn! Somebody's shooting at us!
Did he hit you?
Oh... no, I bumped my head falling off my horse.
Ain't shooting at us no more.
Shooting way over yonder.
What the hell's he shooting at over there?
Beats the hell out of me.
Don't reckon we in somebody's field, do you?
I didn't see nothing planted.
Shooting at us again.
Hell, he's shooting up the whole horizon, Will.
Wait! You'll mark us!
Hey, Kid!
Kid?!... You mean that's the Kid shooting at us?
Hey Kid, it's me! Will Munny!
What the hell's the Kid shooting at us for?
Is that you?
Yeah... yeah, it's me!
Now don't go shooting at us no more! You hear me?
Who in the hell you got with you, Will?
It's Ned Logan, my old partner!
Now don't go shooting at us, you hear?
We're gonna collect our horses and come on over there.
You ain't going to shoot, now are you?
No... no, I ain't!
- Chased that horse a damn mile. - What the hell was you shooting at us for anyhow?
- I thought you was following me. - We was following you.
- Like you said if I changed my mind... - Wasn't nothing said about no partner, Will.
Well, this here's Ned Logan.
This is the Schofield Kid, nephew to Pete Sothow.
I seen two fellows following me. My guess is you come to kill me.
We never talked about no other fellow.
Well, there's two of them cowboys isn't there? Better there's three of us, in case they got friends.
I figure I can take care of them two cowboys myself. It don't take three.
Ned's an awful good shot with a rifle. Hit a bird in the eye flying.
Better than you, anyhow Kid.
Hell, you wasn't even coming close.
Get your damn hands off my rifle, mister!
Thought I'd check it for you. Thought maybe something was bent.
It ain't bent.
Well you were shooting all over creation!
You gonna share your half with him?
I figure three ways.
You figured wrong.
Sorry I wasted your time, Ned.
What? You going back with him?
Well he's my partner.
He don't go, I don't go.
What's it come to, three ways?
Shit!
What the hell you pissing on about?
- What are you looking at, anyhow? - "Looking at"?
Clouds, Kid.
Looking at them clouds over yonder on account of we got a storm riding up our ass.
Oh, them? Hell, I seen them.
You was smart to change your mind, Kid.
I'm a real good shot with this rifle.
See that hawk up there?
I could hit that hawk with one shot.
Hell, l could hit it too, Ned. If I didn't mind wasting a shot.
There ain't no hawk, Kid.
You can't see for shit, can you?
See your canteen?
Alright, how far can you see?
Far enough.
We ain't going to Wyoming to shoot canteens goddamn it! How far?
- 100 yards? - More.
- Can you see that scrub oak yonder? - Fuck you Ned.
He's blind Will!
I ain't blind you asshole!
Now hold on! Hold it!
How far can you see, Kid? 50 yards?
You bet your ass I can see 50 yards, Will.
I can see well enough to shoot this son-of-a-bitch right here in front of me.
Now hold on.
You hear that, Ned?
Kid can see 50 yards. Fine.
Jesus!
50 yards'll do just fine. Now let's move out.
Boy, they look like real hard cases, Bob.
Did you kill all seven of 'em dead?
Or did you just wing some of 'em?
Now that is you there embalmed on the cover?
"The Duck of Death"?
It's the Duke. "Duke of Death."
You always were hell in Jesus with a pistol Bob, but seven of 'em? Boy!
And you protecting that woman and all that. How in the hell do you do that?
Well, you see, it's generally considered desirable in the publishing business to take a certain...
...liberty when you're depicting the cover scene.
It's for reasons involving the marketplace, etc....
Well, Mr. Beauchamp, from what I read, this here book the writing's not that much different than the picture.
Well I can assure you, Mr. Daggett...
...that the events that are described in there are taken from the account of eyewitnesses, sir.
Eyewitnesses?
Yes sir!
You mean like the Duck himself, I guess.
The Duke.
Duck, I says.
"You have insulted the honor of this beautiful woman, Corcoran..."
...said the Duck.
"You must apologize."
"But Two-Gun Corcoran would have none of it..."
"and cursing, he reached for his pistols and would have killed him...
...but the Duck was faster and hot lead blazed from his smoking six-guns."
See I consider that to be an accurate depiction of the events.
Albeit, there is a certain poetry to the language which I couldn't resist.
Ahh, Mr. Beauchamp...
I was in the Blue Bottle Saloon in Wichita...
...the night that English Bob killed Corky Corcoran...
and I didn't see you there.
Nor no woman.
No two-gun shooters.
- Nor none of this. - You were there?
Yeah, I was there.
First off...
...Corky never carried two guns, though he should have.
He was called Two-Gun Corcoran.
Yeah, well, a lot of folks did call him Two-Gun, but that wasn't because he was sporting two pistols.
It was because he had dick that was so big...
...it was longer than the barrel on that Walker Colt that he carried.
And the only the only insulting he ever did was stick that thing of his into this French lady...
...that English Bob here was kinda sweet on.
You see the night that Corky walked into the Blue Bottle and before he know's what's happening...
...Bob here takes a shot at him! And he misses 'cause he's so damn drunk.
Now that bullet whizzing by panicked old Corky... and he did the wrong thing.
He went for his gun in such a hurry he shot his own damn toe off.
Meantime, Bob here...
...he's aiming real good and he squeezes off another...
...but he misses, cause he's still so damn drunk and he hits a $1,000 mirror over the bar.
But now, the Duck of Death is as good as dead...
...because Corky does it right.
He aims real careful.
- No hurry. - And?
That Walker Colt blew up in his hand, which was a failing common to that model.
You see if Corky had've had two guns instead of just a big dick...
he would've been there right to the end to defend himself.
Wait a minute, you mean...
that English Bob killed him when he didn't even have...
Well old Bob wasn't going to wait for Corky to grow a new hand.
No, he just walked over there real slow...
...because he was drunk...
...and shot him right through the liver.
Damn I don't like rocks on my dadgum back!
- I sure do miss my bed. - You said that last night.
No, last night I said I missed my wife. Tonight I just miss my dadgum bed!
You'll miss your dadgum roof here in a while, I suppose.
Shit!
- Say, Will? - Um-hmm?
That business up in Jackson County...
...that really happen?
I mean the way they say it happened?
What business?
On how there's two deputies up close pointing their rifles right at you.
Had you dead to rights.
You pulled out your pistol and blew them both to hell.
Only took a scratch yourself.
Uncle Pete says he never seen nothing like it...
...shooting your way out of a scrape like that.
Yeah... well I don't recollect.
You don't recollect?
That's right.
Say Ned...
...how many men you killed?
Aren't you going to answer the question?
What the hell's that to you?
Well I gotta know what kind of fellow I'm riding with, in case we get into a scrape and all.
How many men you killed, Kid?
Five.
How many?
Five!
I done killed five of them.
That's including a Mexican. He come after me with a knife.
Why don't you shut up? Get some rest.
You boys are as crotchety as a couple of old hens, let me tell ya.
Actually, then, Mr. Corcoran was faster on the draw than the Duck...
Than English Bob?
Faster? Faster was his mistake.
If he hadn't been in such a goddamned hurry, he wouldn't have shot himself in the toe with that first shot.
He would've killed old Bob.
Look, son...
Being a good shot, being quick with a pistol...
...that don't do no harm, but it don't mean much next to being cool-headed.
A man who'll keep his head, not get rattled under fire...
...like as not he'll kill you.
- But if the other fellow is quicker and fires first... - Then he'll be hurrying and he'll miss.
Look here.
That's about as fast as I can draw and aim and hit anything more than 10 feet away.
Unless it's a barn.
But if he doesn't miss?
Then he'll kill you.
That's why there's so few dangerous men around like old Bob.
Like me.
It ain't so easy to shoot a man anyhow, you know
especially if the son-of-a-bitch is shooting back at you.
I mean that'll just flat rattle some folks.
Let me show you something.
Look here. Take that.
Go on, take it.
There's the key.
All you gotta do is shoot me...
...and you and Bob can just ride on out of here free as birds.
- Is it loaded? - Wouldn't do much good if it wasn't.
First, you got to cock it.
Go on, cock it.
Now you got to point it.
Go on. Point it.
Now all you got to do is pull the trigger, mister.
Hot, ain't it?
You didn't even put your finger on the trigger.
What if...
What if I gave it to him?
Give it to him.
...wh... you don't really want me to...
Give it to him.
I guess he don't want it, Mr. Beauchamp.
You were right not to take it, Bob.
I would have killed you.
We could use some rain, Mr. Beauchamp.
You no-good, goddamn pig-fucking whore!
Sorry, old horse.
I brung this along for when we have to kill them fellows.
Figured we could use some now.
Not me. I don't touch it no more.
- Aw, come on, Will, it's raining. - I know it's raining!
Give some to the Kid why don't you.
You think that Kid really killed five men?
No.
When you were talking back there about the time them deputies had the drop on you and Pete...
Well, I remember there was three men you shot, Will, not two.
Well I ain't like that no more, Ned!
I ain't no crazy killing fool.
Still think it's gonna be easy to kill them cowboys?
If we don't drown first.
Give these keys to the conductor.
Tell him he can loose old Bob's cuffs as soon as he's outside the county.
Got my pistols?
I guess you know, Bob that, uh...
...if I see you again I'm just gonna start shooting and figure it's self-defense.
I didn't steal your biographer!
He's staying on his own account!
Well he can go stuff himself as well, can't he?!
A plague on ya... a plague on the whole stinking lot of ya!
Without morals or laws!
And all you whores! You got no laws, you got no honor!
I tell you for a fact it's no wonder you all emigrated to America!
Because they wouldn't have you in England!
You're a lot of savages, that's what you all are...
...a bunch of bloody savages! A curse on ya!
Nobody's going to come...
...after what Little Bill done to that Englishman.
Delilah, them tables ain't clean... can't you get 'em clean?
and maybe if you'd cover up your face, somebody might wanna hump with you
and you wouldn't have to do all that cleaning.
What do they call them things you cover up your face with?
A veil.
Yeah a veil. Get a veil!
Rain's coming.
Thank God.
You sure?
You all right there, Will?
Hey, 's a fellow asking for you Alice.
Tonight? You ain't joshing?
This way, mister.
Must be randy as hell to come out in this shit.
"No, no! You're wrong, Little Bill!" he said.
"That's not a Curly J. That's a Bobbed J!"
He had changed it over. And I said to him...
..."Jim, you're a liar and a horse thief!"
Now when he saw the rest of 'em wasn't gonna help him none, he started crying...
...and sobbing and just a carrying on.
He said, "Oh, Bill please oh God, please, don't kill me, Bill!"
So I said, "Jim, it just makes me sick..."
Open the window, will you?
" ...to see a man carrying two pistols and a Henry rifle...
...and crying like a damn baby."
- So you killed him? - No.
But I should have.
I can't abide them kind.
You see them in the taverns, you know.
Tramps and drunk teamsters...
and crazed miners.
Sporting their pistols and acting like they were bad men.
But without any sand or character. Not even any bad character.
I do not like assassins...
or men of low character.
Like your friend, English Bob.
But, now Bob, he was no coward, you know.
No, he wouldn't come up to your face and cry and carry on like that--
Sheriff... I just...
Yeah, damn. Well, I don't have any more receptacles.
Well, maybe you should just hang the carpenter.
What?
I was just saying because of the... You know, if you hang...
Doesn't matter.
What the hell?
On a night like this!
- Who in the hell is it? - Deputy Charley Hecker, Bill.
What?
Three fellows just come into town, Bill. They're down to Greely's.
There's two of 'em got guns.
What the hell's keeping that Kid?
You don't suppose he's up...
Jesus, Will!
You look like shit.
You remember Eagle Hendershot?
Yeah.
I saw him.
Will, he's dead.
No, I saw him, Ned.
His head was all broke open. You could see inside of it.
Jesus! Will. You got a fever.
- Take a drink, will you? - Worms were coming out.
Look, Will, I'm gonna go up and see what's keeping the Kid.
Must be he's getting an advance from one of them sporting ladies.
Will, uh... look, if I was to...
I mean, if it worked out that I could take a little time for myself...
I don't suppose you would...
I mean you wouldn't...
Naw, I guess you wouldn't want to come.
Give me the pistol, mister.
I says give me over your pistol.
I ain't drunk.
Ordinance says you got to turn in your firearms to the county office...
...day or night.
I guess you didn't see the sign, what, with the weather and all, huh?.
No.
But I ain't...
I ain't armed.
What about your friends upstairs there? They got any pistols?
No, I guess... no, they ain't armed either.
Spilled your whiskey.
Look, I said I...
What's your name?
William...
...Hendershot.
Well, Mr. William Hendershot...
...what if I was to say you was a no-good son-of-a-bitch and a liar?
And then if I was to say that you shit in your pants because of a cowardly soul...
...I bet you'd show me that pistol right quick wouldn't you, you'd shoot me dead.
Isn't that so?
Maybe, I guess.
But the fact...
...is I ain't carrying no firearm.
Get up.
Come on.
What's this for, snakes and such?
Yeah.
We don't have any snakes in here, Mr. Hendershot.
It ain't loaded or... Powder's wet?
You see, Mr. Beauchamp?
This is the kind of trash I was speaking of!
You find this kind in all the saloons in all your prosperous communities!
Wichita!
Over in Cheyenne!
Abilene!
But you won't find them in the town of Big Whiskey.
Hurry up! You know what to say to Little Bill.
Now you guys look sharp for that lone pine. You miss the pine, you ain't gonna find it.
O.K. never mind the shirt, ma'am! Put the fuck his boots on!
What about Will? What are we gonna do about Will?
Come on, Kid!
Let's hope them horses are still there!
Let the man out, W.W.
He's desiring to leave the hospitality of Big Whiskey behind him.
Easy Little Bill! She's gotta work.
She's got to turn a dollar a time.
If they was just here for the fuckin' how come they lit out the back window?
On account of they seen you was beating on their friend.
They just come for the billiards Little Bill, honest.
Billiards?!
What, you mean they were just passing through here?
They was going to Fort Buford.
You just kicked the shit out of an innocent man.
Innocent?
Innocent of what?
Jesus, Ned!
You done this before?
Plenty times.
His pistol must've jammed.
Here. Bring that candle in a little closer. I can't see.
He wouldn't've take no beating like that if it hadn't've jammed.
He wouldn't just give it over and not shoot no one.
He don't look so good.
He didn't even pull his pistol, huh?
Yeah, well, he ain't as tough as you, Kid.
Yeah, well, at least I would've pulled my pistol, Ned.
You did! Right out of the lady and out the goddamn window!
- That was your idea! I wanted to go back-- - We got to go.
What? Already? Hey, darlin' I'm near ready for another advance.
You're gonna use it all up before you even get it.
No more advances on what you ain't done yet.
Hey sweetheart, we're just waiting on the weather to clear!
Once this weather clears up...
We're going to need more food! About three days' worth.
Three days?
Ned, we could kill 'em tomorrow.
I don't kill nobody without him.
We don't need him! The two of us could do it.
Besides...
...he ain't nothing but a broken-down pig farmer.
One of us'll bring food in the morning.
We'll bring you some whiskey too!
And some medicine if you got any!
Don't it make you sick hearing him like that?
Hey, don't you ladies worry none!
Me and Ned, we'll kill them two sons of bitches for ya!
Claudia.
Will?... Will?
Claudia's not here.
Is that you, Ned?
I seen him, Ned.
I seen the Angel of Death.
I seen a river, Ned.
He's got snake eyes.
Who Will? Who's got snake eyes?
It's the Angel of Death.
Oh, Ned!
I'm scared of dying.
Easy, partner. Easy.
I seen Claudia too.
That's good, Will! That's good you saw Claudia, ain't it?
Her face was all covered with worms.
Oh Ned, I'm scared.
I'm dying.
No, don't tell nobody.
Don't tell my kids...
...none of the things I done. You hear me?
All right, Will.
He's gonna die, ain't he?
Maybe.
Well, supposing he does?
We'll bury him.
That ain't what I mean, Ned.
You mean will I help you kill them cowboys?
I can't spot them myself.
But you could.
That big bastard, you could spot him a half-mile off, I bet.
And if I spot him?
Well then I ride up close and shoot him.
Just like that?
I told ya, I'm a damn killer. I done it before.
I'm more of a killer than he is anyhow.
Yeah?
Yeah.
I thought you was an angel.
You ain't dead.
Some big fellow he...
...he really kicked the hell out of me.
I must look kinda like you now.
You don't look nothing like me, mister.
No offense meant.
You got to be the one those cowboys cut up.
My partners, Ned and that Kid...
...they around?
They went out scouting when they saw your fever broke.
Scouting?
Out to the Bar T...
...looking for them.
How long I been here?
Three days.
Are you hungry or...
Three days?
I ought to be...
I thought I was gone.
I wouldn't normally pay no notice to high country like this...
...trees, but I'm sure noticing now.
I thought I was dying for sure.
I brought your hat.
You left it down at Greely's.
Thanks.
That sheriff...
- He still looking for me? - Little Bill?
No, he thinks you went South.
Are you really going to kill them cowboys?
I guess.
Still a payment coming, isn't there?
Them other two, your friends...
...they been taking advances on the payment.
Advances?
Free ones.
Free ones?
Alice and Silky been giving them free ones.
Hmm, I see.
Would you like a free one?
No I... I guess not.
I didn't mean with me. I meant...
...Alice and Silky would be happy to give you a free one if you wanted one.
That's all I meant.
I didn't mean I...
...I didn't want a free one on account of you been cut up and all.
What I said the other day about you looking like me, that ain't true.
You ain't ugly like me.
It's just that we both got scars.
But you're a beautiful woman and if I was to want a free one...
...I'd want it with you I guess more than them other two.
It's just that I...
...I can't on account of my wife.
Your wife?
Yeah... you see...
I admire you for that.
For being true to your wife and all.
I've known a lot of men...
...who weren't.
Yeah, I suppose.
Is she back in Kansas?
Yeah.
Yeah, she's watching over my young ones.
Hang on Slim! Hang on.
Get the damn iron! Hold it!
Davey! Come on Davey-boy! Come on Davey!
Jesus, fella!
Jesus, boys, my leg's broke!
I'm pinned, boys!
Better finish him, Ned.
He ain't dead? You didn't get him?
He got the boy's horse.
Better finish him before he gets clear.
Get behind them rocks, Davey-boy.
Get over there, Davey!
What happened? He ain't killed?!
What's going on?
He gets in those rocks, we ain't gonna get him.
- Unless we go down there. - What rocks?
Why don't you shoot? What's going on, Ned?
Well ain't you gonna shoot?!
Will?
I ain't very good with one of these.
Keep going, Davey! The rocks! Keep going!
Did you get him?
Will, where is he?
How many more shots do I have?
Ned, goddamn it! How many more shots do I have?
Two.
Did you get him?
Here, reload this.
- You missed him. - I got him.
He ain't killed.
Maybe, maybe not.
Got him through the gut, I think.
You think he's gonna die?
You think we killed him?
Yeah.
We killed him, I guess.
I'm dying, boys!
Well then you shouldn't have cut up no woman, you asshole!
Jesus, I'm so thirsty!
Slim!
Slim, give me some water, please!
Please, Slim!
I'm bleeding, Slim!
Give him a drink of water, goddamn it!
Will you give him a drink of water, for Christ's sake! We ain't gonna shoot!
You ain't gonna shoot?
No!
Hold on, Davey-boy!
Here I come now!
Don't shoot me, you bastards!
Davey!
Shit!
Davey!
They take him water?
Yeah.
Jesus, Johnny! They shot him!
Davey, hold on now!
You murdering bastards! You killed our Davey-boy!
When we gonna double back?
After a ways.
Not me.
I'm heading on back down to Kansas.
We got to kill the other one first.
Look, Ned, with any luck, we'll find him by nightfall or in the morning.
Then we can shoot him and head on back with the money.
- You want the Spencer, Will? - This ain't no time to quit, Ned.
- You know you're gonna lose your share Ned. - Shut up!
I'll see you, Will. So long, Kid.
Ned!
Here.
I ain't no good with that damn thing anyhow.
Look... me and the Kid'll head over to that ranch and we find him we'll shoot him.
Then we'll meet up with you and pick up our money and all head South together.
Well, supposing he don't go back to the ranch, Will?
Well he ain't gonna go into town, I figure he won't stay out in the open country.
No, he'll hole up at that ranch.
Well I ain't waiting.
I'll look in on your young ones when I get back.
Hey, Ned!
Don't pay no attention to what the Kid said about the money and all.
I'll bring your share.
Kid's full of shit.
Little Bill?
Just doing some repairs up here.
They killed one of them cowboys.
Shit!
Parsons said how he seen three men, right after sunup, headed out East.
And one was on a dun and another was on a flea-bitten grey.
Only he didn't know what the third one was on,
could have been an Appaloosa 'cause he was looking right into the sun.
Bill, Amos says to ask you if the county's gonna pay for feed for all the horses or not.
Witherspoon says he won't sell us no more 30-30 shells without we pay.
Hell, use my dogs!
Then the county's got to take responsibility.
Don't worry about them horses now...
you just get on out there to the Bar T and make sure that other cowboy...
stays put and don't expose himself, hear?
I didn't think they'd really do it.
Did you think they come clear up from Kansas to fuck us?
No, but... that Kid, he's just a boy and the other one...
...Will, the nice one, being so true to his wife and all...
Wife? He ain't got no wife.
- Oh yes, he does. He-- - I told ya, he ain't got no wife.
Not above ground, anyways.
Murdering whores!
He had it coming!
He had it coming for what he done.
And the other one too!
Both of them for what they done!
We got one!
We got one, Sheriff! Out by Cow Creek!
- Is he alive? - Hell, yeah!
Bunch of us boys from Bar T went out looking on account of them killing one of our own.
Come across the son-of-a-bitch on a roan heading South.
Did he admit it?
No. But I guess he will soon enough. Had a Spencer rifle on him.
Those cowboys messed him up?
A little bit I guess.
Alright. Find Andy.
Get on out there. See if you can find out what happened to those other two fellas!
You see anything out there, Buck?
Hell, yes I did! Seen about 200 fellas packing rifles.
Got the place surrounded. Say they want Quick Mike's ass.
I said, "How much?" They says, "About five." I said, "Dollars?"
They said, "Cents."
I said, "Sold."
Well, I ain't worried!
Because I got me some protection.
- Tell you where them others is? - Nope.
Give 'em any names?
Didn't tell us nothing but his own name, Ned Roundtree.
Bring him in.
Well Ned...
you'll want to tell me and Mr. Beauchamp here...
all about your two villainous friends I guess.
I'll be glad to hear the names and whereabouts of those murderous son-of-a-bitches.
Sure is ripe.
Going to get a lot riper.
You think he's still in there?
Yeah, he's in there.
Yeah, well he's holding on to his shit like it was money.
He's in there.
You tell me right off if you see him.
Yeah.
Ain't gonna shoot him your own self, are you?
You can shoot him.
Now Ned... you and Mr. Quincy and...
What was the young fella's name?
Elroy...
Elroy Tate.
No... No, that's not what you said.
Hell if it ain't!
No, you said...
"Elroy Quincy out of Medicine Hat and...
Henry Tate out of Cheyenne."
Hell if I did.
Charley...
Go and get them whores what fucked these boys the night of the storm.
Strawberry Alice and Silky?
Yeah! Go on. Get 'em! Go on.
Now Ned...
Them whores are going to tell different lies than you.
And when their lies ain't the same as your lies...
well I ain't going to hurt no woman.
But I'm going to hurt you.
Not gentle like before...
...but bad.
Where you going?
- Goin out to the shithouse. - Well let me finish this hand will ya?
What are you gonna protect me while I take a dump?
- You're gonna get bushwhacked. - I'll fart on them.
- I'll go with ya. - Yeah, you can wipe my ass, Thirsty.
Hell with him, you know. The man ain't polite, he oughta get shot.
Is that him?
Yeah, that's him.
All right, Kid. Go get him. He's all yours.
Assassins!
Shoot him!
Come on, goddamn it!
Did you get him?
Yeah.
Cover me.
- I can't see 'em! - Just shoot damn ya!
Was that what it was like in the old days Will?
Everybody riding out, shooting...
...smoke all over the place, folks yelling, bullets whizzing by?
I guess so.
Shit, I thought they's gonna get us.
I was even scared a little.
Just for a minute.
Was you ever scared in them days?
I can't remember.
I was drunk most of the time.
I shot that fucker three times!
He was taking a shit, he went for his pistol and I blazed away.
First shot...
...I got him right in the chest.
Say, Will.
Yeah?
That was the first one.
First one what?
First one I ever killed.
Yeah?
You know how I said I shot five men?
It weren't true.
That Mexican who come at me with the knife?
I just busted his leg with a shovel. I didn't kill him or nothing neither.
Well you sure killed the hell out of that fellow today.
Hell, yeah!
I killed the hell out of him, didn't I?
Three shots and he was taking a shit.
Take a drink, Kid.
Jesus Christ!
It don't seem real.
How he ain't gonna never breath again, ever.
How he's dead.
And the other one too.
All on account of pullin' a trigger.
It's a hell of a thing, killin' a man.
You take away all he's got...
...and all he's ever gonna have.
Yeah.
Well I guess they had it coming.
We all have it coming, Kid.
I was watching ya, seeing that you weren't followed.
Silky and Faith they rode off to the East and two deputies was following them.
Here... You wanna help me count this stuff Kid?
I trust you Will.
Well don't go trusting me too much.
In fact, we'll give Ned his share together.
That way you'll know I ain't holding out on you.
Ned's share?
Yeah. He went South. We'll catch up to him.
Ned... He's dead.
What do you mean, he's dead?
He went South yesterday. He ain't dead.
They...they killed him. I...I thought you knew that.
Nobody killed Ned!
He didn't kill anyone. He went South yesterday!
Why would anybody kill Ned?
Who killed him?
Li...Little Bill.
The Bar T boys caught him...
...and Little Bill... he beat him up.
He was making him answer questions, and beating him up and then Ned just died.
They got a sign on him says he was a killer.
They got a sign on him?
In front of Greely's.
A sign on him in front of Greely's!
These questions Little Bill was asking...
...what kind were they?
About where you and him was.
Then what?
A cowboy come in saying you killed Quick Mike in the shithouse at the Bar T.
So Little Bill killed him for what we done, huh?
Not on purpose.
But he started hurting him worse.
Making him tell stuff.
First, Ned wouldn't say nothing.
...and then Little Bill hurt him so bad, he said who you was.
He said how you was really William Munny out of Missouri.
...and Little Bill said, "The same William Munny that dynamited the
...Rock Island & Pacific in '69, killing women and children and all?"
...and Ned said you done a lot worse than that. Said you was...
...more cold-blooded than William Bonney and how if he hurt Ned again...
...you was gonna come kill him like you killed the U.S. Marshal in '70.
That didn't scare Little Bill, did it?
No, sir.
Give me your Schofield.
What for Will?
Give it to me.
Yeah. Sure.
You go on, keep it.
I'm never gonna use it again.
I won't kill nobody no more.
I ain't like you, Will.
You better ride on back, Miss.
Go on, keep it...all of it. It's yours.
What about the spectacles and the fancy clothes?
I guess I'd rather be blind and ragged than dead.
You don't have to worry, Kid. I ain't going to kill you.
You're the only friend I got.
Here, take this money and give my half and Ned's half to my kids.
Tell them if I ain't back in a week, they give half to Sally Two Trees.
You can keep the rest. You can get them spectacles now.
You're gonna kill Little Bill aint ya?
You stay clear of folks you see. There'll be a lot of 'em out to hang you.
Get going.
Alright I'm gonna say this just one more time, to make it clear, so don't ask me again!
Those of you on the posse today got one drink coming from the county budget!
And those of you who rode yesterday get one drink for that too.
Alright hold it! Now hold it.
Now that's two! But after that, it comes out of your own pocket! Do you hear me Skinny?
- Yes, sir. - Alright, we're pulling out early in the morning.
We're gonna chase these fellas clear down to Texas, so don't spend too much of your own money.
We're gonna divide up into four parties!
...and we'll hit all the farms and the trails...
...to make a big circle...
...and we're bound to come across somebody...
...that's seen these... skunks.
Who's the fella owns this shithole?
You, fat man. Speak up.
I own this establishment.
I bought it from Greely for $1,000.
You better clear outta there.
Just hold it right there. Hold it!
Well sir, you are a cowardly son-of-a-bitch!
You just shot an unarmed man.
Well he should've armed himself...
...if he's gonna decorate his saloon with my friend.
You'd be William Munny out of Missouri...
...killer of women and children.
That's right.
I've killed women and children.
Killed just about everything that walks or crawls at one time or another.
And I'm here to kill you, Little Bill.
For what you did to Ned.
You boys better move away.
All right, gentlemen. He's got one barrel left.
When he fires that, take out your pistols...
...and shoot him down like the mangy scoundrel he is!
Misfire! Kill the son-of-a-bitch!
Any man don't want to get killed, better clear on out the back.
I'm shot! I'm shot!
You ain't shot.
Oh, look, please...
I don't have a gun. I am not armed.
Pick up that rifle.
Pick it up.
Shells too.
You killed Little Bill.
Sure you ain't armed?
No... look...I'm not. I don't have a gun.
I've never had a gun. I write. I'm a writer!
A writer?
- What, letters and such? - No, books.
Books.
I don't believe it, you killed five men. Single-handed.
Yeah.
That's a Spencer rifle, right?
That's right.
Who a... who'd you kill first?
Huh?
"When confronted by superior numbers...
...an experienced gunfighter will always fire on the best shot first."
Is that so?
Yeah... Little Bill told me that. You probably killed him first didn't ya?
I was lucky in the order.
But I've always been lucky when it comes to killing folks.
Who was next? ...was Clyde, right?
You musta killed Clyde, well coulda been Deputy Andy...
All I can tell you is who's gonna be last.
I don't deserve this.
To die like this.
I was building a house.
Deserve's got nothing to do with it.
I'll see you in hell, William Munny.
Yeah.
All right, I'm coming out!
Any man I see out there, I'm gonna kill him!
Any sumbitch takes a shot at me...
...I'm not only going to kill him, I'm gonna kill his wife and all his friends...
...and burn his damn house down!
Nobody better shoot!
O.K. Charley Heckor, go ahead. Shoot him!
I can't.
Hell, no! I ain't no deputy!
You better bury Ned right!
You better not cut up nor otherwise harm no whores!
Or I'll come back and kill every one of you sons a bitches.